Joey is stoked to get an audition for a stage play directed by the legendary Leonard Hayes, played by Jeff Goldblum, who is also the lead in the play. Joey fails to impress Leonard with his flat audition and is about to get the boot, when one of the producers intervenes. The producer thinks Joey is "hot" and tries to convince Leonard to give Joey another chance. Leonard capitulates, and gives Joey some advice for his return audition. "... you're in your head, you're thinking too much." "Don't learn the words, let the words learn you." "...don't be afraid to explore the vertical."
Joey returns later that evening to audition again, even though has to relieve himself badly. Leonard's assistant declines to let Joey pee, so Joey gives a jumpy audition Leonard loves, (not knowing he Joey has a full bladder) and Joey earns a chance to come perform in front of the plays backers.
Figuring having to pee "makes (him) a really good actor" Joey drinks everything he can find before heading to his final audition, which works. With Joey once again needing to pee he gives another fidgety performance, Joey gets the part, but as he tries runs for the restroom, Leonard stops him to congratulate him and hugs him as he tells him "he can "relax" now, then pats his back strongly. After this Joey loses control of his bladder and wets his pants while Leonard Hayes is hugging him. Leonard then feels something wet then backs up to find Joey peeing his pants as the scene ends.
Meanwhile, When a robber who just took Ross's wallet at gunpoint is recognized by Phoebe as her street friendLowell, Ross learns that Phoebe used to mug people when she lived on the street. An indignant Ross returns to the coffee house and informs Monica about Phoebe's previous occupation as a mugger. Monica recalls that Ross was mugged as a kid by a huge guy outside St. Mark's Comics, and that the mugger stole his backpack which had all "the original artwork for his own comic book, "Science Boy".
Ross leaves, and Phoebe, memories recalled by Ross's story, admits to Monica that she mugged Ross (he was lying when he claimed a "huge guy" mugged him, embarrassed by the fact that he got mugged by a girl). Phoebe confronts Ross to apologize for mugging him and Ross gets upset. Later, Phoebe brings Ross a box labelled "Crap from the street" in which she kept his comic, "Science Boy" for all the years since she mugged him. Appeased by the return of his long lost comic, Ross thanks Phoebe and the two read over "Science Boy".
Chandler gets and aces his own audition, for an unpaid intern job as writer in a publicity firm, where he is considered the old dude, but proves wit transcends generations by elaborating the only bright idea for a product which rather appeals to childish Joey, sneakers on roller blade wheels.
The episode ends with Monica revealing to Ross that she's told "everyone they know" that he was mugged by a girl instead of a huge guy, like he claimed he was.